The other day at the local library, I was standing next to a copy of
the Oxford English Dictionary, as I am wont to do, sneaking drags off
unfiltered Gitanes and trying simultaneously to look pained,
intriguing, and authoritative. Another presumed lover of language, also
standing next to the dictionary, suddenly turned and asked me to
define a word for him. The word itself is not important. Puzzled and
flustered — nay, incredulous — I replied, "Why don't you look it up?
You're standing right next to a dictionary!"
This outburst drew a crowd, naturally, and while some folks merely
suggested more or less comical definitions for the word in question,
still others went out of their way to disclaim any knowledge of the
word, or even the language to which it belongs, before chiming in with
their own definition. Before long, I was surrounded by three dozen
people, all of whom were arguing about whether the word was noun or
verb, transitive or intransitive, of Latinate or Germanic derivation,
and whether the 'e' on the end was silent. I crept away, noting with
some concern that nobody even cracked the authoritative resource
that lay in front of them. Guns, crude handmade knives, and
shuriken came out, and the security officers maced everyone within
50 yards of the venerable OED. The carnage. The humanity. The
implications for the future of our Great Land.
Of course, this is but a small sampling of the dangers that await
those who fail to consult definitive references before speaking. But I
see the same thing every day on Web design mailing lists, too often
with the same tragic results (only without the weapons, mace, and
security officers). The Web is one big library, albeit a library with
1,500 different card catalogs, annoying men in loud suits
carrying advertisements up and down the stacks, and the occasional
strobe light in the rare materials section. But it's still a big
library, make no mistake about it.
So, then, why do so many feel the need to ignore the vast resources
available to them, publicly and repeatedly offer up disinformation,
and generally offend the basic tenets of the liberal arts education?
What can be done to help these people, so obviously confused by their
encounter with a badly constructed tutorial, or ruined by unmonitored
self-study? I mulled the problem over a strong cup of Kenya AA and
suddenly struck my fist into my palm, shouting, "Eureka! We must
introduce them to the primary sources!"
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